Carmen receives support through the mental health care project run by Cáritas Diocesana de Zaragoza. At first, she was not even aware of what was happening to her. The trigger came after spending a year caring for her sick partner. “That situation made me lose control of my life, and my mental health began to fall apart,” she recalls. Her family doctor had already warned her that, as a caregiver, she also needed to take care of herself, but at the time she felt “empowered, as if I could handle everything.”
Until she could not anymore. “By the end of my partner’s life, I was no longer myself,” she explains. Her condition eventually required admission to a psychiatric unit, and the diagnosis did not come immediately. “The diagnosis was delayed because they carried out a huge number of tests.” When she was finally able to put a name to what was happening, accepting it was not easy either. “I took it quite badly; the truth is that it was very difficult for me to accept,” she acknowledges.
“THE ILLNESS ITSELF LEAVES YOU UNABLE TO FUNCTION”
One of the difficulties in explaining depression is that it does not always resemble the image people have of it. In Carmen’s case, there came a point when everyday tasks were no longer easy. “I could not do most of the things that other people could do,” she says. For Carmen, when you are in that acute stage of depression, “the illness itself leaves you unable to do anything.”
She also does not believe there is a single way of experiencing it. Contact with other people at the San Carlos Psychosocial Rehabilitation Center has allowed her to learn about experiences different from her own. “It is difficult to talk about depression because I can only tell you how mine began,” she points out. Carmen was diagnosed with severe depression and, in her case, those around her later told her that she “cried constantly, repeated the same things and got stuck in a loop.” She barely retains any memories of that period.
Behind her testimony lies a reality that affects thousands of people in Aragón. The latest report on the prevalence of depression published by the Government of Aragón in 2024 records a crude rate of 52.5 cases per 1,000 men and 128.1 per 1,000 women. In addition, rates among women are higher than those among men in every healthcare sector in the region.
A JOURNEY WITH UPS AND DOWNS AND PLENTY OF SUPPORT
Carmen’s recovery has not followed a straight line either. She went through several hospital admissions and discharges, attended a day hospital and spent some time living at one of her siblings’ homes. She has been connected to the San Carlos Center for around a year and a half and acknowledges that she has also experienced a relapse. Now, however, she can look back from a different place. “Now I can say that I am much better, but thanks to the support of my family and my friends…” she says.
“I am fortunate, you know? Because I have a support network that many people do not have,” she acknowledges. Alongside that support, she credits medication, psychiatric and psychological follow-up, and the work of the center’s professionals. She also does not overlook her own role. “And also thanks to the effort I am making to regain control of my life,” she says.
For those around someone with depression, understanding what is happening is not always easy either. Carmen admits there were times when she felt her family and friends did not understand the situation she was going through. “The wounds you have are not visible, so it is difficult to understand,” she says. She believes that this invisibility continues to fuel part of the stigma. “I think there are many prejudices. Although throughout this process I have also realized that mental health is more visible now.”
“TO LOVE MYSELF A LITTLE MORE”
Time and recovery have also changed the way Carmen sees herself. When she talks about what she has learned during the process, she does not think of great lessons; her answer is much simpler: “To love myself, to love myself a little more, because I loved myself very little.” She also says she has learned “to be more empathetic toward others” and “to value small gestures, the little things, and above all to look at life in a different way.”
Her story also shows why seeking help can be decisive. Carmen did not initially recognize that she was suffering from depression and needed other people to step in when she could no longer manage her day-to-day life on her own. That is why, when she thinks of someone who may be beginning to go through a similar situation, she insists that they “should not hesitate for a second to ask for help from those around them, and above all should seek professional help, because they are truly the ones who understand this extreme situation and the ones who really help you move forward through the process,” she concludes.
